"What sorts we Fifty Fifty! I cheated bald, wicked drifter and the beautiful and intelligent lady!"
Alfonsi, when he actually met his wife?
- "Hmm, about a year after the wedding!"
Dear, I am the perfect woman?
No, dear, the ideal woman overcoming the considerably.
And by how much?
Thus 50kg.
Quarrel spouses:
On: - "Please, neštvi me, or made me wake up beast!"
She: - "... you think I'm afraid of ass ?!"
How is your wife got into a madhouse?
We went for a hike in the mountains, where it was nice echo. And she always has to have the last word ....
"Is your wife a lot of chattering?"
"To not. When we were on holiday at the seaside and she even tan tongue."
"How much would you give for my wife?"
"Not a farthing."
"True, it is yours."
The couple at the concert.
She: "Johnny, here someone is sleeping!"
He: "And because you wake me up?"
The wife said: "I'm so distracted. I wanted to buy a tie and I bought a purse!"
Marital strife culminates, she is furious and shouts:
"Instead, I was supposed to marry the devil than you, a tyrant!"
"But darling, she did well know that marriages between close relatives are not allowed!"
"Honey, I want a Christmas baby."
"You're crazy, you think of him in the eyes of needles!"
"Darling, you are tolerant enough?"
"Yes, of course."
"So please snes down into the trash bin."
"Honey, I fell into the river, he would jump for me?"
"And when I say that yeah, you fall?"
"My husband died three days after the wedding." - "That long suffered."
Man woman, "you cleansed my jacket and coat?"
"Yes."
"And the pants?"
"Yes."
"And the shoes?"
"Do not - there are pockets too?"
"Would you forgive infidelity?" "Himself, yes, but not him!"
If you still believe that a woman loves you more than your dog, try to urinate into her boat!
Rumor woman to her husband:
"I'll go for five minutes to the neighbor and in the meantime do not forget to stir the porridge every half hour ..."
"Why are you so sad?"
"But .. my wife leaves me three weeks to the sea."
"That you do not understand ?!"
"Why? If I was not sad, she would think about it!"
Why are men with earrings suitable for marriage?
He suffered pain and bought jewelry!
The first law of marriage:
It is always the fault of the other.
The second law of marriage:
For a mistake they can always both sides, mother in law and wife.
The man asks wife: "Why are you at night and cried in his sleep?"
"I had a terrible dream again the night, I got married!"
"And who are you taking?"
"Again you!"
The man asks a woman: "Could you explain something to me?
Yesterday I had in my wallet three hundred and today it has just got a hundred! "
"Damn it, how is it possible that I overlooked it?"
He asks Pepíček mother: "Mom, what does the stork, though arrange a baby?"
"Why, he turns on his side and he snores!"
Asks the woman's husband: "If I ran away with another, you're sad?"
"And why should I be sorry for a foreign guy?"
Quarreling spouses were staying at the hotel. Walks into the room.
She says: "Hey, I can see the deer out the window!"
He: "That's not doe, but the cow and it's not a window but a mirror !!!"
Judge for prisoners: "And what is your main reason for their request for conditional release from prison?"
"I want to marry."
"Hm, it is enough strange ideas about freedom!"
"Daddy, why did you marry your mother?"
"See?" turns a man to a woman. "Neither the child can not understand it!"
"Daddy, how much do I need money, I could marry?"
"I do not know son, I'm paying for it today!"
"Your wife has come to you to visit" - announces superintendent prisoners.
"I protest, tightening of such punishment in the judgment of nothing!"
"There's so nice," said the man's wife, "and you jerseys with parketama!
You'd better go on the air and wash my car. "
Basic question:
Is there life after the wedding?
Mobile ringing, "Honey, where are you?"
"On the hunt."
"And so there panting on the phone?"
"Bear!"
Woman: "Here I read that after the wedding wise men."
Man: "I've found out. But it's too late!"
Women changing the iron man's logic on a worthless scrap.
Source: Editorial Post
